In other news…

The bucket list is all well and good but let’s take a quick break from it and catch up on events since 13th June (the last proper entry).

A couple of days after that entry something great happened. I met up with a girl from the internet dating site I started using. Although the first date went really badly as I was incredibly shy her friend convinced her to give me a second chance. And I am so glad he did! While it has ended up as just friends and not the romantic relationship I had hoped for, I have made an amazing friend, Gale.

i wont lie, I liked her as more than a friend and for the first 6 or so weeks I was crushing on her like mad and had developed some feelings for her. Unfortunately for me those feelings were not reciprocated and so we have ended up as just good friends. That is better than nothing at all so I am happy with it.

However, with good news, comes bad new. I guess it balances out the universe. Unfortunately in late June I lost my grandfather. He had been ill for a long time so I guess it wasn’t really all bad, and at least I went to visit him only days before he went to hospital. I chose to escape from it and ignore it all until his funeral, I was out drinking and just away from home for most of the time between his death and his funeral (thank you Gale for helping me escape). I didn’t really start to grieve until after his funeral, on the Thursday and Friday, and then escaped it again on the Saturday.

This is when further bad news happened and Gale’s dad fell ill and eventually died a few days later. As Gale was my rock throughout Gramps death and after it this was quite a blow to me and this is when the grieving really started. Not only did I have no where to escape to, but my rock was upset, I was upset and everything was very emotional. I wouldn’t be surprised if I had ended up getting on Gale’s nerves by asking how she was daily and constantly offering to help her. However I had a hidden agenda… I needed to get away from everything, although did genuinely want to help her as she helped me.

Due to these two deaths I have drastically re-evaluated my life, hence my bucket list and actively attempting the goals on it. It has also had a huge effect on my work, so much so that my own work has suffered and jobs which should have been done are still not done, invoices have been delayed by a month and I still, to this day, lack the enthusiasm and desire to do it. However, I hope that soon I will get back on to it but it will not be as often as it was. I now have a life I need to take care of, friends to see and activities to do.

Work, as in the full time job at B&B, has been quiet. So much so that I have been dropped to a three day week. It has been mentioned that they are thinking of getting me to do other jobs around the office to get me back to five day weeks and I hope this happens soon as I will need the money if I am to buy a house and pay a mortgage.

I have started to drink again. I had 5 years of no drinking but the time has come for me to fall off the wagon and enjoy alcoholic beverages once again. While alcohol may not be that good for me it does mean I need to walk for 40 minutes, at least, every time I go to the pub, so it does get me some exercise.

And that’s about that… new friend, lost family but gained more family in the process and a new outlook on life to sum it up in a few words.